Grandma lost her memory

I recently received a e-mail from my Uncle in Australia and am sad that to hear that my Grandma is not going to last till end of the year. As much as I like her to hang on but I hate having to watch her suffer at old age. I too have this idea that when I grow old, I too don't want to stay in this world too long to suffer more then I have to. So I pray that God will have mercy on me when I grow old. Sometimes when I hear others saying about some old guy die suddenly without pain, I start to envy them coz not everybody can choose to die without pain during old age. Perhaps it is a gift... perhaps they have done good and God is repaying them for their good deeds.

The night before I keep trying to find the number to call my Grandma. My son is giving me HELL coz he wants attention and I want to look for the phone number where I kept. Argh.... I have memory laspe these days and it seem to be getting worst. I remember I kept it but not sure where... I was aggitated and again I lost my temper. Usual coming from me. After quite a while I finally found it. This morning I called her. I told her who I was and mentioned moms name but she can only ask 'who are you again' repeatedly and say 'I don't know you'. I feel so SADDENED by this but know little I can do to help her in any way. What I can only do right now is to get her to listen and try to ease her depression.